Fearful Belief

My introduction to the autobiography of Malcolm X was after Spike Lee’s 1992 film. I first read the autobiography 16 years ago. Written in collaboration with Alex Haley the book was the epitome of truth being even more fantastical than fiction.

The autobiography was given to me by Toby D and was a library loan. I was not able to finish the in-depth personable account of Malcolm’s story due to the fact that we were on borrowed time. Spending 3 weeks embroiled with the many twists and turns of Malcolm ‘Red’ Little’s story filled me with a sense of longing to know more about this man, his motives, the message he was sharing and about the legacy he left. Handing the book back to Toby was a wrench.

With over 100 pages read a zenith had been hinted at. I vowed that when I had the time I would buy the book and reread all that I had enjoyed at that first summer’s encounter in 2002.

A reflective Malcolm X

Malcolm X Quiet Reflection

Sadness

In January 2016, I bought the autobiography of Malcolm X, and read it cover to cover in a matter of weeks. Thrilling, surprising, mesmerising, *aweing and ultimately saddening the book turned out to be.

Being asked by a probation officer with a sneer, ‘Why I would want to read about him?’ Engaged a protective response of what the book had meant to me, I asked ‘if they had read the book?’

They answered that ‘they hadn’t’ and I offered that ‘if they did they would learn something about themselves and about America of the 1950’s -1960’s and about the world’s now.’

What I would have liked to have shared, is the utter brilliance of the story and how much of him appears to have been captured. Malcolm sharing his story with Alex Haley – the vibrancy of his epoch is gripping.

Opposite

A thought struck as I talked briefly to Mr Waters, saying my goodbyes to Together, in relation to representation and misrepresentation. What the probation officer appeared to be offering was an idea of who they had held Malcolm X to be and what they knew of him to represent – a villain, a Nation of Islam fundamentalist, a Black Nationalist. Mr Waters on reading the autobiography mentioned that he had learned much about the man and the history he had lived.

Malcolm was the someone who appears to have appeared on the wrong side of history and is forever damned for representing African American struggles in a light that was *oppositional and troubling to the US. A Country in which millions were/are continually oppressed and held to account for not attaining the impossible American dream.

Malcolm X in Chicago

Malcolm X profile

Ignorance

I mentioned to Mr Waters my knowing of the multi-millionaire sitting president of the US.
I mentioned that what I knew of Donald was that he is a successful business man. He also holds a number of perspectives about the world that I do not ascribe to. Twitter Addict.

However, my perspective of the man is skewed by the many way’s in which I know of him; TV, social media streams, radio highlights. What little I knew of Donald included newspaper reports and news about various scandals. The president appears to hold an ideology about various aspects of the world he is living in. Ultimately he wants to make the US a better, a safer place to live,

for…

Wealth

It is at this point that the Artist in me holds two mental pictures in relation to a hero of the people and a despot. Both men are possibly tied by an ideology of wanting to improve their country by making things better by being forthright and open about their visions.

The two men could not be any more different. One who was raised in poverty, the other raised in fantastical financial wealth. One provided for, through adversity and spirituality an education that was a forbearance of his future. The other who was shielded and shown that wealth, gigantic wealth was his birth right and managing that wealth took strength, foresight, finding  weakness in others and exploiting margins ruthlessly as a business person. A combatant.

Fire

Both men became leaders and my knowledge about Malcolm supersedes my awareness about Donald. I find myself protective of Malcolm and his legacy as though the history the man walked with were to be erased posthumously. Malcolm after his pilgrimage to Mecca realised the truth of his faith and sought to bring insight to the Nation’s followers and to America. The Firebrand that had previously been Malcolm’s nom de prix, had aligned to a purpose much higher than what he had become known for.

This for me is the split that the world does not acknowledge of Malcolm. He internally grew beyond the initial yoke of his past including being the main spokesperson for the Honorable Elijah Mohammad. His transformation was as dynamic as a bright light coming on in a darkened space.

Rear view The White House

The White House

Tidal

I am as unaware of Donald as the probation officer was of Malcolm. I have not witnessed a sea change of Donald’s ideas as fundamental as Malcolm’s. Given Donald’s position I am unsure if a fundamental change of his ideas would be supported, or wise for the administration to follow.

Perhaps as a planet we have moved beyond the tipping point, reason and wisdom wan.

Die cast –
Set for controversy,
Destruction
Egomania
Donald.

Fear seems to be the root cause for some of the ideas he has shared: the wall, the ban, the S bag countries of Africa, the ire about football players that knelt for the National Anthem. Expressing a limited understanding for humanity’s endeavouring spirit, the resilience, what reciprocity entails, how to collaborate and the acceptance of difference -fundamentally lost.

Dynamism calls

Change through action Malcolm X

Polar

Both men became who the world at the time needed them to be: a wall builder and a visionary seeing beyond the limits of belief, nation and person. Conquering Fear. Those who knew Malcolm appeared to value and respect the significance of his transformative walk and empowering talks.

Knowing little of Donald, I fail to recognise the value of the transformation he has brought. The doubt I hold, is toward the journey Donald has the world making, could it be as beneficial as Malcolm’s had the potential of being?

Below a few podcasts of interest:

TED Talks Radio Hour Beyond Tolerance and Prevention
Code Switch: In the Age of Trump
Pod Save the World: Trumps New War Plan
Philosophy Bites: Overdoing Democracy
Serial S3: You’ve got Some Gauls
Broad Waters podcast United States of Trump

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Mistaken Identity – Pubs

Complex beginnings

And she said something a few weeks ago that had me wondering about social capital and social responsibility. A note to the wise –  this is a declaration for curiosity and moving into a space of complexity and accomplishing the mighty good.

Islamic intricate design

Islamic Wall Art

Leave

“If I showed up everyone would just get up and leave” she said.
A small piece of my heart broke. Amazed and stunned I listened on as she a Muslim woman spoke about her dislike of pubs and the abject fear she might invoke in others if she were to visit a *house of alcohol.

(*My words not hers)

Comfort

At times silence and laughter are used to cover the uncomfortable. I smiled and reflected on my non pub going history. I held the notion since Uni that Pubs were not spaces I felt comfortable or safe in. Alcohol and the consumption of numerous pints were for others and not for necessarily for me. I also held the misguided notion that if I were to go to a pub much like my colleague I could be the cause of the music to stop, fights to breakout or the lively conversation to awkwardly end, and that I would be caused to leave. I hadn’t thought of people being propelled from a space I walked into due to my ethnicity, or that people may react that way to her for her faith. London Summer of 2018.

Responsibility

Discussing the comment a little more I could see some similar themes between my story and hers. She then said “Because of my faith we do see Muslims that do drink (alcohol) if I were to go into a pub and someone saw me (gestures to her *Khimar) it would, you know, be like a sign that it’s okay. I couldn’t take that responsibility. I wouldn’t want someone to think because I did they would too. I just don’t like pubs for me. I don’t get it really. Since I converted it’s not something I can see myself doing.”
*I had thought that a Hijab was the attire worn by some Muslim women. But an Hijab I was reliably informed is a term used for a woman that is covered.

Warmth like a boat riding a wave

Islamic Art by Sargodha

The Greater Good

In that moment I got it. My colleague was not thinking solely about herself or the other Muslim who may, by chance see her entering a pub. I believe my colleague was speaking about the greater good. The ability to place community both seen and unseen alongside and in front of ones individual needs. A greater I, a social responsibility to other faithful Muslims. The request to ‘go to the pub’ came from someone that was leaving the organisation. An unwritten rule of going to the pub to say goodbye to their team and the organisation was the offer. Personal needs/responsibility met social capital with respect and honour – and undoubtedly won.

Awe and Humility

The altruist was observing another law. One that she chose to follow, be in awareness of and sit humbly with. A gentle observing of what unity means for her faith and community that simply outshines the tidal experiences of work alliances and friendships. What was true for her was that attending a pub went against a fundamental truth and did not bow to external pressures from the team. I am usually awed by the immense of space, by scenes of staggering beauty, deft and touching poetry, art that takes breaths away, music that opens doorways. But this, this, this was something else. It spoke of time, respect, values, integrity. It spoke of the greater WE and a love that appeared without an end. Quietly…

A Better WE

My acceptance to pub and bar life is tentative and retracts like a wave. Alcohol is a cognitive disinhibitor and a troubling agent for thinly veiled opinions and loose tongues. I am looking for a greater more un-inhibited WE outside of religion and pubs, away from schoolisms and other human trappings that control, dehumanise, limit and separate. The WE that views all as a continuum and is hungry for parity and better centuries to follow Now!

Four Corners coming together

The Pillars of Unity

Searching

I seek what may never be found – a utopia, an ideal, a peace amongst humanity that lasts. Perhaps the need is myth and arises at these worrying and troubled times. Or as Eric Hoffer has written about we came as close to a difficult place as we could and were scared back into what we knew. Dank Dark Smelly Fear. And here we could remain until we all purposefully choose something better. My wish for her, for me, for Us is that we find other ways…

A few thought inspiring podcasts to end with.

Code Switch

Tim Ferris with Sam Harris

Science of Success

TED Talks Radio Hour Beyond Tolerance 28 uly 2017

Two Guys On Your Head